Top 10 totally pointless wine accessories

28th August, 2012 by Patrick Schmitt

We have rounded up 10 wine-related gadgets which provide little or no practical use save for some entertainment.

Having trawled the world wide web it’s apparent there’s an impressive industry catering for the wine drinker who already has the basic necessities – that is, glasses, corkscrew and preferably some form of storage.

Such a trade is highly inventive in its ability to dream up and produce a broad array of items that are frankly useless except for the amusement they may cause when revealed for the first time.

Among the objects manufactured, notably silly examples included stemware designed to make you feel drunk, as well as a beer jug that doubles as a wine glass, and a Paris goblet that fills itself (pictured).

Other items discovered include a monstrous carafe designed to look like a vine (or set of udders?), and a metal bottle holder complete with a piano player who doesn’t play.

Over the following pages we have counted down ten of what we believe are the wackiest and most pointless wine-related objects on sale.

We’re sure none of them will directly improve your drinking pleasure.

6 Responses to “Top 10 totally pointless wine accessories”

  1. Barina Craft says:

    Ditto on 9 of the 10 being pointless ( other than a good laugh ).

    As a manufacturer of fine wood furniture we encourage the use of coasters on our home bars, as do most others for their pieces. Its more than just wiping up spills, its protecting the finish in a number of ways. Would encourage readers to review http://www.barinacraft.com/wood_furniture_care.html for other tips as well.

  2. Taster80 says:

    Deadly!!! Saw a woman at a CC event take a flace plant and slice her aeortic. Law suits waiting to happen with these!

  3. John Radford says:

    Number 1 is actually quite useful at stand-up tastings: somewhere to put your (empty) glass whilst writing in your notebook and moving to the next table. I wouldn’t trust it with a full one, however.

  4. Are you kidding? This is the greatest invention since indoor plumbing. When you’re at the Wine Experience grand tasting with a glass and a plate of food, shaking hands with old friends, this is an indispensable accessory. I have two.

  5. Stevie says:

    Absolutely hilarious, so enjoyed this look at what some people would buy (or why are they selling this stuff?).

  6. Tom says:

    Some ‘not so great’ stuff … but all great fun really! We loved the robot wine rack but would never want to own it of course.

    For anyone who would like a ‘proper’ wine storage solution (and some of these do get quite technical if not robotic), have a look at our wine cooler comparison site: Wine Fridges Online

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Subscribe to our newsletters

Job vacancies

UK Brand Ambassador - That Boutique-y Gin Company

That Boutique-y Gin Company
Tunbridge Wells, Kent, UK

Senior National Account Manager – Grocery (Craft Spirits)

Maverick Drinks
Tunbridge Wells, Kent, UK

Senior National Account Manager – Wholesale RTM (Craft Spirits)

Maverick Drinks
Tunbridge Wells, Kent, UK

Digital Marketing Manager

Master of Malt
Tunbridge Wells, Kent, UK

Experienced On Trade Sales Person

Borough Wine Imports
London, GB

3 x Business Development Executive

The Lakes Distillery Company Limited
Newcastle head office and nationwide, UK

Editor

Master of Malt Ltd
Tunbridge Wells(Kent)

Sales Account Manager - On-Trade

Berkmann Wine Cellars
Liverpool

Brand Manager

Hallgarten Druitt
Luton, UK

Experienced On-Trade Salespeople Required

Portal Wines and Spirits
London, UK

Purchasing and Sales (Wine Trader)

JF Tobias
London, UK

Sales Account Manager - On-Trade

Berkmann Wine Cellars
Cambridge / Peterborough / Bedfordshire, UK

The Global Merlot Masters 2017

Deadline : 17th April 2017

db Awards 2017

Deadline : 28th April 2017

The Global Organic Masters 2017

Deadline : 14th April 2017

The Global Sparkling Masters 2017

Deadline : 12th May 2017

Click to view more

Global Chardonnay Masters 2016

Now in its fourth year, the competition will identify the best Chardonnay from all around the world in every price range.

Rioja Masters 2016

Now in its fifth year, the competition will recognise and reward the finest Riojas on the world stage.

Fortified Masters 2016

Now in its third year, The Fortified Masters will reward the best fortified wines on offer.

The Global Malbec Masters 2016

the drinks business is proud to announce the inaugural Global Malbec Masters 2016.

Click to view more